学习啦>学习英语>英语阅读>英语笑话>《让人忍俊不禁的英语双语笑话合集》正文

让人忍俊不禁的英语双语笑话合集

时间:2019-08-08 18:10:08本文内容及图片来源于读者投稿,如有侵权请联系xuexila888@qq.com 小洁 我要投稿

  英语的笑话总是那么的幽默而又搞笑,今天就让我们一起来看看吧,希望大家会喜欢。

  一、耳朵还在我衣兜里

  Ivan came home with a bloody nose

  伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。

  and his mother asked, "What happened?"

  他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”

  "A kid bit me," replied Ivan.“

  一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。

  "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.

  “再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。

  "I'd know him any where," said Ivan.

  “他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。

  "I have his ear in my pocket."

  “他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”

  二、有你和我是候选人

  The preacher was vexed because a certain member of his congregation always fell asleep during the sermon.

  As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon.

  So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation.

  "All who want to go to heaven, please rise."

  Everyone got up except the snorer.

  After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of his voiced,

  "All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."

  Awaking with a start , the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpi——

  "Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on,

  but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."

  牧师非常生气,因为总有一个人在他说教时打瞌睡。

  一个星期天,正当坐在前排的那个人又在瞌睡时,牧师决定要好好教育他一下,

  让他不要再在布道时睡觉。

  于是他低声对信徒们说:“想去天堂的人,都请站起来吧。”

  所有的人都站了起来——

  当然,除了那个打瞌睡的人。

  在低声说过请坐后,牧师高声喊道:“想去下地狱的人请站起来!”

  打瞌睡的人被这突然的喊叫声惊醒了,他站了起来。

  看到牧师高站在教坛上,正生气的看着他。

  这个人说道:“噢,先生,我不知道我们在选什么,

  但看上去只有你和我是候选人。”

  三、我是坐在爸爸膝盖上的

  Little Johnny says "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning,

  小强尼说:“妈妈,今天早上和爸爸在公车上时,

  he told me to give up my seat to a lady."

  他叫我让座给一位女士。”

  "You've done the right thing," says Mommy.

  妈妈说:“你做得很对呀。”

  "But Mommy, I was sitting on daddy's lap."

  “但是,妈妈,我是坐在爸爸膝盖上的。”


相关文章:

1.成年人笑话段子

2.十大经典笑话段子

3.超级励志开心一刻笑话大全

4.每日一笑的幽默笑话段子

5.内涵段子

6.段子笑话

7.2017十大经典笑话段子

8.经典笑话大全笑破你的肚子

【英语笑话】图文推荐
【英语笑话】精华文章
【英语笑话】相关文章
学习啦友链、商务、投稿、客服:QQ:3061683909 邮箱3061683909@qq.com

Copyright @ 2006 - 2020 学习啦 All Rights Reserved

学习啦 版权所有 粤ICP备15032933号-1

我们采用的作品包括内容和图片全部来源于网络用户和读者投稿,我们不确定投稿用户享有完全著作权,根据《信息网络传播权保护条例》,如果侵犯了您的权利,请联系:xuexila888@qq.com,我站将及时删除。

学习啦 学习啦

回到顶部
博评网